The problem with dating an HIV negative guy is that they don’t understand everything. And what I mean is that your meds equal mood swings, you know, stuff of that nature. And the hardest part is that they don’t want you to be human. I’m a very strong person, but I have my days where I break down and I don’t want to hear, ‘Marvelyn, I need you to be strong.’ I want to be able to have my ‘HIV moment.’ And they don’t understand that because they want to forget that you are.

SM: What triggers the breakdowns?
Marvelyn: After you find out the 20th person you know with HIV just died, it gets overwhelming. It’s also hard when I’m in the grocery store trying to get Oreos and they’re like ‘you’re the girl with AIDS!’ I’m really more than that and I hate that a lot of people just see me for that.

SM: I read on your blog that there were some men you dated who were HIV negative that still wanted to have unprotected sex. What do you make of that?
Marvelyn: That scares me. It is easier for a man to give it to a woman than it is for a woman to give it to a man. So they’re like, ‘oh it’s low risk. I still got a chance here.’