SM: Do you have to maintain a certain weight?
Lindsay: I do. I have to monitor myself a lot. With my eating disorder I trained myself to not feel hunger or fullness. I don’t have those feelings in me anymore, so when I study for finals week—and I’m stuck in a library—if I don’t force myself to eat, I won’t even think about food.

SM: Have you been able to pick up that hamburger again or enjoy eating junk?
Lindsay: I can. I am not perfect. I definitely have some issues with my eating that are pretty obvious to people. I know my roommates sometimes get aggravated with what I eat.

SM: Like what?
Lindsay: I don’t like to cook meals. I’m very stuck on cereal—I eat cereal constantly and sometimes that’s all I eat in a day if I’m in and out.

SM: Are you okay with your body image currently?
Lindsay: Not at all. I’ve learned just to not register my mind into any of my actions because I don’t see what other people see.

SM: How do you deal with that?
Lindsay: I’ve kinda learned. I’ll look in the mirror and see something and I’ll tell myself, “This isn’t what other people see,” and then I’ll walk out and go somewhere.

SM: Do you ever look back and feel like you missed out on high school?
Lindsay: All the time. I don’t want to take back my eating disorder because I feel like that’s made me who I am today and I’m thankful for that. But also I do—I regret not being able to remember anything. I don’t remember my first high school dance, I don’t remember playing basketball—there are so many memories that are just gone from me.