SM: How did you get away from him?
Lindsay: When he was done he just rolled over like it was no big deal. I got up and went to the bathroom. My friend was in the living room on the couch sleeping and I just got her and said, “We have to go. Please let’s leave now.”

SM: Did you tell your friend? Did you report it to the police or go to the hospital to get a rape kit done?
Lindsay: No, I didn’t. I was just in so much shock about what had happened. I remember thinking maybe I should say something, maybe I should do something, but I was in this perpetual state of blaming myself.

Lindsay Young SM: Why were you blaming yourself?
Lindsay: My mother always told me growing up that nothing good happens after midnight. I was coaching myself into believing that had I been a better decision maker, if I had been home doing my homework, not had a drink, not gone in the apartment, then it wouldn’t have happened.

SM: How was your body afterwards?
Lindsay: All morning I was throwing up blood, I was physically ill from what had happened. The back of my neck was covered in bruises, I had handprint-like bruises on my arms and legs and scratches around my wrists where he was trying to hold me down.

SM: If you didn’t press charges and didn’t tell anyone about it, how did you deal with the rape right then?
Lindsay: I started consuming alcohol as a means to survive. Before I was really involved in school with all these Christian-centered collegiate organizations and, at this point, I totally shut down. I started drinking and stayed wasted ALL the time.