Are You Too Smart to Date?
So what's the deal? One theory is that men want women who will stay home, raise the children and care for them.
Most of the press so far on this study has taken the stance that smart chicks are basically out of luck—no man will want them. (This is a common theme in the media: You're over 30? You'll never get married! You have children? You'll never get married! ) I wonder though, do smart women know something the rest of us don't? (I mean, besides the molecular formula of spam...). Maybe it's not that smart women can't find husbands. Maybe they've seen the inventory, weighed their many options and decided to go it alone instead. Maybe some smart women just find the idea of being a wife unappealing.
As a smart girl who found my perfect match in a very smart guy, the study makes perfect sense to me. On the flip side, I have to say I was more than a little disturbed when I began to wonder if my steady stream of boyfriends and occasional proposals meant I was the slightly dumber girl of their dreams.
Prepared for a duel, I approached my sweetie and asked. When it came to relationships, was he looking for someone smarter than him? Or someone dumber? He smiled and answered, "Someone exactly as smart." (I bought it, so maybe he is the smart one after all.)
Most of the press so far on this study has taken the stance that smart chicks are basically out of luck—no man will want them. (This is a common theme in the media: You're over 30? You'll never get married! You have children? You'll never get married! ) I wonder though, do smart women know something the rest of us don't? (I mean, besides the molecular formula of spam...). Maybe it's not that smart women can't find husbands. Maybe they've seen the inventory, weighed their many options and decided to go it alone instead. Maybe some smart women just find the idea of being a wife unappealing.
As a smart girl who found my perfect match in a very smart guy, the study makes perfect sense to me. On the flip side, I have to say I was more than a little disturbed when I began to wonder if my steady stream of boyfriends and occasional proposals meant I was the slightly dumber girl of their dreams.
Prepared for a duel, I approached my sweetie and asked. When it came to relationships, was he looking for someone smarter than him? Or someone dumber? He smiled and answered, "Someone exactly as smart." (I bought it, so maybe he is the smart one after all.)
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Displaying comments 1 to 3 out of 3
| LISAMATTIE3955 -- BERKELEY | |
| HELLO FROM LISAMATTIE3955, YES TO A CERTAIN POINT FOR ME DATING A MAN, WHY CAUSE ME PERSONALLY I ALWAYS FEEL LIKE THE MEN SHOULD NOT BE TOLD WHAT TO DO, HOW TO THINK, THINK WITH BASIC COMMON SENCE, DO SIMPLE TASKS,AND FOR ME LISA I THINK BEFORE I ASK A QUESTION TO A PERSON AND I USE MOST BASIC COMMON SENCE THATS SOMETHING MOST MEN AND WOMEN DONT DO NOW DAYS AND WHEN THEY RELIZE WHAT THEY HAVE SAID ITS TO LATE TO CHANGE RIGHT.MOST MEN DONT THINK LOGICAL ENOUGH FOR ME SO I RATHER BE ALONE,ITS GETS LONELY TO BE A LONE BUT FOR ME LISA IM FINE WITH IT, AND ME I LIKE OLDER MEN ANY WAY SO MOST TIMES I DONT HAVE THOSE PROBLEMS MOST WOMEN GO THROUGH WITH A MAN ANY WAY CAUSE I STAND AND LOOK BEFORE I JUMP RIGHT. THANKS LISAMATTIE3955 | |
| swan480 | |
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As I consider myself a highly intelligent woman, I have a few comments to make. First of all, I've dated men who are both dumber and smarter than me. The dumber ones typically felt threatened to me and constantly tried to cut me down on an emotional level to make up for it. The smarter ones (of which there were very few) were incredibly annoying - I wasn't a threat because I wasn't smarter than them, but instead I was a trophy because I was *almost* as smart. Personally, I think it's insulting to smart women to hear an intelligent woman say she wants to find a man who's smarter than her. It's like saying you *want* to be subordinate to your significant other. When I found my Mr. Right, I knew he was intelligent and well-read enough for me to hold a conversation with him, and that was enough for me. To this day I don't know who's smarter...and I honestly don't care. We have an equal relationship, and that's what matters. However, I *do* think there's some truth to the idea that smart women marry less because they know better. Think of it this way: half of those who *do* marry these days get divorced. So maybe less smart women get married, but has anyone thought to look at the divorce rates? Maybe smart women are more likely to have high self esteem, less likely to feel dependent on men, and therefore less likely to make mistakes in their love life. If that's the case, I think the lower marriage rate among smart women are ENcouraging, rather than DIScouraging. |
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| kristart | |
| What about people being different kinds of "smart"? If one partner is great at math and the other is great in languages I think they can compliment each other really well. On another note...I think many guys like to date women that are less intelligent, but like to marry women that are on the same intellectual level. | |
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