I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve heard women say, “Men are dogs.” Since joining the online dating scene, I’ve begun to regard that statement in a whole new way. It seems to me that looking for the right mate is very much like looking for the right dog. As I go out on dates, I’m screening for companionship, loyalty, livability, attractiveness, personality, temperament and trainability—not unlike what I looked for when I got my first dog last year. So I’m applying the lessons learned from dog shopping to my present project of mate shopping:

Know yourself—decide what’s important to you.
When I decided to get a dog, I listed qualities that were important to me: I like fluffy dogs, with very soft fur. My canine companion should be quiet, with an easy-going temperament. (I’m not into high-maintenance or high-strung dogs.) My dog will be cute, but need not be gorgeous. And finally, it would help if the dog is already semi-trained.

I’ve given similar thought to the man I want in my life. I’d like one who’s attractive, but he need not be gorgeous: His personality is what I’m going to be living with. Easy-to-live-with is very important—no high-maintenance guys. And just like my dog, my man should be intelligent, funny, responsive, loving and playful.

There are many wonderful ones from which to choose.
As I began my dog-shopping, I discovered there are many terrific dogs available, in all different colors, sizes, faces, bodies, voices and personalities. There were dogs for every taste and lifestyle. None were inherently good or bad, just different. All I needed to do was find the one who would fit my taste and my lifestyle.

It’s the same with men. There are many terrific men available, in all different colors, sizes, faces, bodies, voices and personalities. None are inherently good or bad, just different. I want to pick the one who’s right for me and my lifestyle.