Budweiser: “I am really into monster truck rallies.”

Colt 45 wrapped in a paper bag: “I hardly have enough money to buy new underwear, let alone this beer.”

Hard cider: Hard cider of any kind is just a mistake.


Harvey Wallbanger
A fashionable drink from the 1970s, this cocktail says one of two things about the guy who orders it: He has spent one too many nights with his parents, or he’s reading a book on the retro scene. Determine his reasons for choosing this refreshing cocktail before giving him your number.

Fuzzy Navel
A true newcomer to social situations orders a Fuzzy Navel. This drink says, “I attend wedding receptions regularly.” The drinker is uncorrupted by the trendy social scene. Take him by the hand and show him the way to a fun-filled evening.

Rum and Diet Coke
Any Diet Coke mixer lets you know that person is watching his weight. If he’s already thin, he might be a little bit anal retentive, so avoid him. If he’s chubby on the other hand, give him some credit for trying to shed the pounds.

Margarita
The ultimate frou-frou drink. A girl drinking margaritas can be the newest addition to your Party Girl entourage. Get to know her and soon you’ll be dancing on the bar and bonding.

If a guy looks comfortable drinking margaritas, he probably has female friends who influence him, a very good thing indeed. Of course, he also may be gay, especially if the drink is pink.

Extra tip: Throw all of the previous rules out the window if a beach is nearby. Then any icy concoction goes.

Jack Daniels
A true “manly man” drink. If a guy is drinking Jack Daniels, he’s a fun partier, but he might not be that stable to date at this time in his life. He’s the one who will end up face down in the gutter hours after the bar closes.