It’s the end of the date and he’s walking me to my door. I'm enjoying the conversation and I'd like to keep chatting. So, before he can go in for the awkward, post-date smooch, I casually ask, “Wanna come in for a drink?” What We Mean:
“When I ask a guy to come in for a drink, I just mean I don’t want the date to end,” says Amanda, 30.
“I really mean just that. A drink,” says Marnie, 28.What Men Hear:
“If a girl, after a date, asks you to come in for a drink, it means, ‘Let's fool around,’” says Sharad, 31.
Steve Nakamoto, author of Men Are Like Fish
, explains that not all men think that an invitation for a drink is an invitation for sex. He says that when some guys hear those words, they simply think that “everything must be okay and things will continue in the direction they were going on the date.”
Still, he admits that the woman can really set the tone for what the guy thinks based on her actions on the date. “If there hasn’t been any touching or flirting up to this point, then it may not mean that she wants to get physical,” says Nakamoto. What We Shouldn’t Say:
Dave, 28, says, “I went on a first date with a woman and we had a bottle of wine at a bar and when the waitress asked if we wanted another, my date said, “No, I have wine at my place.” As Dave found out later, she did not intend to sleep with him that night but really just wanted to share a bottle of wine.