he does all this, but I still don't know that he is a keper...

These are great. I find alot of truth in them. Only one thing I would chsnge is that any of these goes for men and women. So I would name it 25 universal truths about men and women.

I appreciate this article it's very informative. Thanks :)
At least now I can understand men better lol

I never realized this was an issue for me. lol who knew men feel pressured during sex as well!

It seems men only notice what's on the outside at least that is what I have seen from experience!

She wasn't saying "all" models are anorexic. She's saying that looking at the ones who are anorexic it's gross.

i have to laugh. some of it is true but some of it is NOT! esp. about the dating in italy, mexico and australia. the men in spain are generally harmless but you have to watch out for the men in portugal.

EXERCISE!!!

I feel bad for this guy!! One, when a guy really likes a girl, his biggest fears are about his performance. If he goes soft, it somehow means he isn't a "real" man. Also, he wants to please you and is worried that he won't. Second, no one is born with killer sex skills, everyone is born a virgin. It's like talking and walking. It's a skill you have to learn. Third, guys learn sex skills from dubious sources and figure if something worked for an ex, it'll work for you. Last, this guy trusts you so much that he was willing to let you see him at his most vulnerable moment and have it be him, versus him playing Casablanca. And what do you do? Complain about it! Sure, the sex might not have been the best, but his performance issue is something that you can work on. The faces and weird noises? What are you? Some kind of critic? If it really bothers you that much, try looking at yourself next time. Maybe you were doing something weird, too! If you're guy wrote into a blog about how weird you were, how would you feel? Yeah. Not too good, huh? Give this poor guy a chance. You were with him once and assumed it would be earth shattering, mind numbing, OMG sex. And since it wasn't, you're considering DUMPING him? I'm sorry honey. But anyone who has sex with a guy once and dumps him because he does a couple of weird noises and has a performance issue isn't worth the guy's time. If he'd done something really off (like mentioned how much you remind him of his mother/sister/cousin) then, yeah, that would be something I'd dump a guy for. But for making a couple of weird noises and not lasting as long as you'd like? Shallow, much? I hope you're a perfect sex Goddess. Otherwise, you need to get some perspective.

When people admire others, there are two terms I use depending on their intent. If the intention is to ask someone out or hook up with them, I equate it to shopping. They're checking out the merchanise, comparing options, with the intent on taking something home. If the intent is to admire the merchandise but not to sample it or take it home, that's window shopping. Almost everyone does this, no matter they're age, gender or dating status. You said you've never window shopped since you're in love with your boyfriend. Are you sure about that? You've never had discussions with your girlfriends or co-workers about how hot some Hollywood celeb is? Or some model you saw in an ad? That, too, is window shopping. If you're guy was glancing at this girl (or if she was especially hot, ogling her for a moment or two) then that is normal. But if he was staring her down and ignoring you, that's when his behavior leaves the realm or "normal" and starts being rude. Also, you asked him the question and he answered. I'll never understand why women ask their guys questions, then get pi**ed at the answer. Nor why women assume that once a guy is in a relationship, he'll go completely blind except for his girl!! Do YOU go blind when your in a relationship, except for your guy? Nope. Didn't think so.

If sexual history refers to the number of partners, then that info is better left unsaid unless one of you is a virgin (in which case, that discussion should be held way before you get to a bedroom). But in regards to STD's, then, YES!! The person who is infected should tell their partner. It's disrespectful to have sex with someone who is not infected when you know you are without telling them. They should be able to make an informed decision that's right for them. I personally wouldn't want to have sex with someone with an STD even if precautions could be taken to prevent me getting it. Other people might be OK with doing that...but that is a choice everyone person should be able to make for themselves.

Actually, you've misunderstood the term "binge eating". We're not talking someone who pigs out at Christmas or other special occasion. We're talking about people who, in one sitting, eat a whole pizza, then move on to a couple packages of cookies, then have a Big Mac, etc., etc. As someone who is a recovering food addict, I say YES!! Too many people focus on anorexia and bulemia but forget about food addiction and binging. Both are very difficult to overcome. I overate as a way to emotionally handle abuse that I was suffering at home. These are real disorders. They are not the imagination of people wanting to justify our nations obesity epidemic. The stereotypical "fat person" is someone who sits on their butt all day, stuffing their face. Let me tell you there are a varitey of reasons why someone might be obese. Like my sister, it could be a physical disorder, like chronic exhaustion. For others, it could be food addiction (at my heaviest, I weighed 268 pounds). Still other people can have thyroid imbalances or be on medication for psychiatric disorders. This isn't to say all people who are obese have a reason for it. Just that some people do exercise and eat right and still have a hard time losing weight. More people need to focus on food addiction and bingeing as well as anorexia and bulemia because there are people who need help and not only aren't getting it, but are being ridiculed and bullied.

It was just me, my sister and our mom when I was a kid. My birth father walked when I was four, and even though he was an abusive SOB, it still sucked for me to hear other kids say "My Dad got my mom diamond earrings" or whatever. Not only because I felt bad for my mom, but because I was envious of the kids and their fathers. So, my mom started a tradition. She'd get us presents and we'd buy (or make) her something, too. That way, we had our own special thing. That was a valuable lesson: we don't need men to make us happy. As an adult, I do feel slightly envious of other single women, but my family still follows our tradition, even though my mother is now in a relationship with a man who I consider to be my father. Maybe you could do something similar with your single friends. Just something small, we're not talking expensive or whatever.

I bought some black, tight yoga pants to wear underneath my jeans for winter. One, it keeps me warmer than jeans alone. Two, if my jeans are a little tight because of bloating then my yoga pants cushion the button and fly so it doesn't cut into my stomach. Three, they add a safegaurd layer in case of leaks. Shirts, I just wear my norm (long guy shirts...I love em!!) Period underwear is a must. They're cheap granny type briefs that, if there is a leak, it's no biggie since they cost like $3 (buy them in bulk at Kmart or TJ Maxx-you'll save a lot of money).

The mountains are my favorite place to be. I was born in the big city (I swear someone hates me!!) but I'm a country girl at heart. Riding ATV's or snowmobiles, fishing, hiking, camping, whatever. I'm there!! Swimming in the ocean sucks!! I've done it. Won't do it again. Swimming pools? Too many people, too little space. Give me a lake or river, any day of the week!! And whitewater rafting!? Now there is a reason God loves us!! I hate the gym. Blah!! As for Lexie, some advice. You said you don't like to go home to change cause' you tend to stay put. Take your hiking gear to work and either change there or use a port-a-potty (gross, I know, but it works!!) The outdoors rejuvenates me. The crisp air, the scenery. It all makes my adreneline pump and I can exercise longer.

I have a cousin who grew up two blocks away from me. She's 24, I'm 26. She has always thought she's superior to me. So, too, has the rest of our family. She's not just white, she's Victorian pale. I've got dark skin from my Mexican/Cherokee birth father. She's got a college education and is graduating soon. I went for three years before I dropped out. Her mother is fairly well off, financially, and pays off my cousin's credit cards (she shops like Paris Hilton on steroids), bought her a car and not one but two computers after she crashed the first. I don't have a lot of money nor do my parents. Last, she's a size 6. I'm a size 16. This all combines to make her a Goddess and me trash. Supposedly. So, a thick skin was necessary for the survival of my self esteem. I look at it this way: sure, she's thin, has money and a college education. However, she's also spoiled, still throws tantrums reminiscint of a six year old wanting, and not getting, a candy bar, is also a back stabber, manipulative and a liar. Hmmmm. Now, I'm not saying I'm perfect. Far from it. But I don't play games. I am spoiled but not because I expect stuff then get it, but because my father likes to spoil his little girl. I don't lie to people. Sometimes, I'm too honest. Yes, that is possible. Also, people who mess with my family and friends quickly realize that is a good way to get on my bad side. Which isn't something most people like to do. In the end, I'd rather be poor, uneducated and have a little extra weight along with loyalty, integrity and pride in myself than be thin, rich and well educated and be a complete bit**.

First off, gang rape is different from a gangbang. Gang rape is where several men rape a woman. A gangbang is where one woman has consensual sex with three or more men. Second, if the woman were having either one, at least two of the men would be standing near her face (hinting at oral). Last, what is actually being depicted is a form of exhibitionism. The first image you think of is some perv flashing himself in public. That is one kind, but, as someone who is into exhibitionism, let me tell you there are three other kinds, as well. The first is having sex or masturbating in front of a group. The second is having sex in a public or semi public place. The third is masturbating for your partner. This woman is being held down which is rough sex, not necessarily rape, and the other men are watching, not participating. Thus, why it's exhibitonism, not a gangbang or gang rape. Now, for the issue of treating women like objects. I think this issue has been blown a little to much out of proportion. The real issue isn't ads featuring women in sexually explicit poses or situations. The issue is how are we raising our sons and daughters? To know the difference between fantasy and reality? Or to blur the distinction? And the issue isn't just about sex. It's about violence, too. We need to teach our children the difference between a fun computer/video game, a movie (porn or otherwise), TV show, book, etc. and real life. Fantasy can make life fun. Santa Clause, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy are all some of the more innocent examples of this. Other not so innocent examples exist out there, of course but we know what they are. Yes, women are sometimes treated like sex objects. But, come on, ladies, we've all gone "window shopping" when we're out with our friends and commented on the hot merchandise and what we'd like to do with it. Men aren't the only ones who have dirty magazines and websites. Does Playgirl ring a bell? So, next time, before you pass judgement on men treating women like sex objects, maybe you should stop commenting on what a hot a** Brad Pitt has or looking at a random stud's attributes.

First off, no one is proposing a law that says a woman "has" to get an abortion. Pro-abortionists are just wanting the option available for women IF they decide that. Second, I don't think people realize that abortion isn't going to magically dissapear just because there is a law saying it's illegal. Want proof? In the 1920's, abortion was illegal but it still happened. And, because it was illegal, women committed horrendous acts to end their pregnancies. Some women even died or contracted TB or other deseases as a result. Women did this because they were having children one after another and that put them in physical jeopordy. Too many babies, too fast and our bodies can't recover. Some of the methods desperate women resorted to were throwing themselves down stairs, inserting metal hangers (sometimes even with rust on them!!) or going to so called doctors (men who were unlicensed and untrained) who operated in back alleys with dirty, contaminated, crude medical devices. Sometimes, they weren't given anything for the pain. Do we, as a nation, really want to go back to that? Do we, as a nation, really not understand the reasons that women have abortions? I recently saw a documentary about three women who were faced with this heartbreaking decision. One doctor said; "No woman gets pregnant just so she can have an abortion. This is a heartbreaking decision." I totally agree. What happened to having rights in this country? How dare conservatives tell me what I can do with my body? It's not their Da*m business!! It's no one's business but mine!! Why should a woman (or child!!) who has been raped and who got pregnant by her rapist be forced to carry his child in her body and give birth to that child? There are actually some women who have deseases that could kill them if they get pregnant. They are on birth control and maybe they can't get a hysterectomy for whatever reason. Should they have to stop having sex in order to save thier lives, just in case that 1% chance of getting pregnant on birth control should fall to them? Or should they have the right, not only to have sex with their husbands/partners, but to LIVE? Every case is different. Every woman should make that decision herself. Not someone who has never met her, who knows nothing about her!! Not because it's someone else's religion or personal belief!! But because it's her personal belief!!

These web sites offer advice and promote behavior that threatens another persons safety. Therefore, it is criminal and should be prosecuted.

What constitutes free speech in this country has been twisted and warped. For instance: the gay man who was tortured to death in Wyoming? That was a crime, not free speech. A discussion that includes discriminatory terms (the "N" word, the "C" word, the three letter "F" word, etc.) if done among like-minded individuals, is free speech. Any act, whether verbal or physical that harms or threatens someone physically or psychologically is criminal.

It's great you've been able to avoid her, but in the future, if you do run into her, my advice would be to talk to your boyfriend about her. Let him know that you feel uncomfortable around her because of some of the things you've noticed. It's great you haven't lowered yourself to her standard, however, being a rug isn't good for you, either. If you and your guy can talk to this girl and explain her behavior isn't cool, then she really won't have a reason to continue.

Shopping Addiction is a real addiction. It is just like alcohol, drugs or gambling. If you're really wanting to find a way to help yourself, you can get therapy. It really can get totally out of control. Also, it could be a symptom of bi polar disorder. In that case, it'd be called Manic shopping. Which is where someone will buy something way out of their budget (think boats, houses, cabins, etc.) when they manic or "high".

One of the reasons might be the different focus. Entourage has more focus on the sex with a little bit of the focus on the relationship. Sex In The City, on the other hand has sex, but it's more about relationships.

You said your husband can't go on medication and that's why you guys haven't had sex. I'm assuming that what you're saying is his sailor has trouble saluting. If that's the case, there are hollow dildos that'll prop him up, making penetration possible. Oh, and play a "getting to know him" game (Truth or Dare, or another sex game) or go away for a romantic weekend to reconnect. If you can't afford a vacation, make one at home. Let people know you'll be unavailable, unplug the TV, phone, internet, etc. and turn off your cell phones. Pretend you're in another city/town.

personally i find that there is an inherent need for people to complain. but the ones who do well are the action oriented complainers. they complain about a problem effectively and actually do something about it! if there is something they don't like, they try to change it. the first step is to be not afraid of change and just take the steps necessary to move on and let go.

At least you have recognized your Achilles' heel. Now you need to make sure you don't fall into that pattern again because there seems to be something in your life that is drawn to "fix" things.

When you're with someone like that (and I have that leaning, too), instead of trying to cheer him up, why not challenge him — "Why do you feel that way?"; "What is the worst that could happen?"; "That's too bad"; "That must be hard ..." etc.

If you ever become a mom (assuming you're not one now), tis will really help you during the teens years when they try to draw you into their drama!

the paragraphs repeat themselves. please edit carefully in the future

the chocolate milk doesn't necessarily work for the lactose intolerant or for people with sensitive stomachs. gatorade, accelerade (yuck!) or for the hard core athletes use pedialyte.

Super quick survey: Do you love your bra? http://www.ilovemybra.com

OK, I hear you fun_in_the_sun, but ... why aren't women in the mood anymore? That's the big issue I'm trying to figure out. End of the novelty? Is it getting boring? What is he doing differently that's not working for you anymore?

And you're right, MorganC, guys do drop the little romantic things and planning after a while. They stop "wooing," and that's one thing I talked about in my blog "What to say I do to" -- you still have to court your lover AFTER you're married or together a long time.

This is true of deaf/hearing partnerships, as well. My boyfriend and I are from the 2 sides of that coin. (We met online, so were able to get to know one another that way.) I am learning sign language, because I love him, and we really have a great relationship.

There needs to be respect and communication, just like there would be if he were, say, Lebanese. I'm not going to learn ASL overnight, but we have been together for 5 months now, and I'm able to converse with him in ASL pretty well.

He's introduced me to a rich world I would have missed out on, had we not dated. He's a wonderful guy, and I'm glad I chose to give this a go.

~The Hippie

Yes, sexual history does count -- along with other a lot of other things as well. You don't say how long you've been seeing him, what other qualities he has that might redeem his character (or show a different side), etc. So, I don't see a need to dump him yet (or ever) if you don't delve a little deeper. Nothing wrong in asking him why he slept with 100 women and what's changed now. Then listen to what he says (not what you hope he says). And if you don't think you can get past it ... move on. Otherwise it will always be the "thing" that comes between you.

cnuttail,
Only YOU can make yourself feel less than adequate, and you are doing that by choosing men who do not value you.
Why? You'll probably have to look deep in yourself to figure out why, and that's important. Wine, lingerie and candles are surface things to make us feel good about ourselves -- the real way to feel better is to go below the surface. And to make a better choice of partner. good luck!

Well i am a mother to a 2 year old and i wasnt ready either but i did what i had to do to make sure she was healthy and to take care of myself when i was pregnant and now 2 years later i couldnt imagine my life without her

i will be hypenating my name i will keep my last name and hypenate his name

I don't know, Morgan. You both would have to experience each other in a different way to start.

But the woman can lead it. If she decides she doesn't want to be his Love Thang, she can say it to him, and then carry on with her life (and mean it, too, and not get weak and give it up again). If he decides that he wants more than that with her after all, he'll be back — the right way.

And, my bad — my blogs are at http://blogs.marinij.com/katwilder .. not blobs!!!!

I really don't think my current relationship is a rebound. It was weird how it happened--I'd only been out of my last relationship for a month when I met my BF, and we were both very up front about the fact that we were not looking for anything serious or long-term; however, we HAVE grown very close very quickly, and I'm confident in saying we ARE in love. (My last relationship was...not a normal one--I had detached from my ex emotionally long before we broke up. I was ready for love, but not in a hurry when I met my current BF.)

We are already talking marriage, in fact.

JM

Thanks for your comments, loves_2_shop.

I also don't believe "once, always," but I'd sure want to know why he cheated, what he learned and why he doesn't think he'd do it again.

That said, there are no guarantees ...

Good luck with your new love!

Just by the way she herself describes the relationship — "I've been hooking up with this guy" — pretty much says it all to me. If you check in with yourself and listen to what you say and feel about what's going on, you'll be in touch with your "gut."

Like what Dr. Kerner says — If he wants to see you and do things with you outside of the bedroom (or wherever you're trysting), then he's interested in you for things other than sex — regardless of what he says. If not, well, save yourself the heartache of wanting more than what's there.

Read all my blogs at http://blobs.marinij.com/katwilder

My guess why so many women (and 31 percent is A LOT!!!) say sex is "eh" has very little to do with their partner and a lot to do with how little they know about their own body and what feels good for them, their shame or discomfort with their body ("I'm too fat," "My thighs are too big," etc.), and their inability to express honestly to their partner what they want.

Until a woman has confidence in her own body and what it can do, it's unlikely that she will love sex — or herself.

Read all my blogs at http://blogs.marinij.com/katwilder

First of all, snooping is never OK in a relationship. Why? Because it totally tears apart the very core — honesty and trust. You violated that and I'm sorry but the "ends" (discovering the herpes meds) does not justify the "means" (snooping).

If he is an honorable guy, he would have the herpes discussion with you when you are beginning to talk about getting sexual — when you'd both want to show some sort of proof of being HIV- and STD-free.

But, alas, you have not been honorable with him, and that would be grounds for him to dump you.

People can and do live (sexually active) happy lives with herpes; no one lives a happy life with deceit.

You can read all my blogs at http://blogs.marinij.com/katwilder

First of all, snooping is never OK in a relationship. Why? Because it totally tears apart the very core — honesty and trust. You violated that and I'm sorry but the "ends" (discovering the herpes meds) does not justify the "means" (snooping).

If he is an honorable guy, he would have the herpes discussion with you when you are beginning to talk about getting sexual — when you'd both want to show some sort of proof of being HIV- and STD-free.

But, alas, you have not been honorable with him, and that would be grounds for him to dump you.

People can and do live (sexually active) happy lives with herpes; no one lives a happy life with deceit.

You can read all my blogs at http://blogs.marinij.com/katwilder

I met the love of my life via an online dating site! He sent me a flirt,I saw his pic, I wrote back, we met for lunch, and the rest is history!

We have now been together for 3 months and are already moving in together! He was only the 2nd guy I dated out of my last relationship. I feel I got incredibly lucky!

Jen M.