If men are leaving skid marks when you show interest, then you are probably showing too much interest: i.e., calling them, accepting last-minute dates, buying them presents, asking them out or seeing them five times a week. All you really have to do to show interest is say "yes" to a Saturday night date (if he asks by Wednesday). Like it or not, the secret to keeping a man interested is to let him keep chasing you until he is practically proposing!
See, it is part of a man's genetic makeup to be the pursuer in romantic relationships. Remember, most men love challenges - gambling, the stock market and bungee jumping. Women love security. We are not saying you have to be impossible to get, just "hard to get" until you are reasonably sure that the man you are dating is going to marry you.
We understand that you don't want to "play games": No one does. But what part of life is not a game? Do you tell your employer that you "hate to work" or "didn't feel like coming in today?" We didn't think so. Ditto for dating! You don't tell a man your whole life story on the first date, spend hours on the phone or online instant messaging him, or sleep with him on the second date if you want him to keep calling. You create desire and longing by pacing the relationship (seeing him once or twice a week, talking on the phone for 10 minutes, and so on) so he doesn't get complacent, but wants you more!
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| NicholeD -- Columbus | |
| I wish I would have read this earlier this week. I have known a guy off and on for three years,we finally hooked up but I felt like it was more me pursuing him. Well it has been two weeks and I want to know if it is too late to begin the "Rules" so that we maybe can start a relationship. We already have had sex and I really do not want to have a relationship based on sex. I really like him as we have alot in common thus far. Where do I go from here? | |