Jai Kissoon, 27, the co-founder of OurFamilyWizard.com who himself has been in an interracial relationship for seven years, explains that expecting your partner to react a certain way is just as dangerous as a prejudice, “If you allow your expectations to guide your experience, you close yourself off to really understanding your partner.”

Do Your Homework.
For me, learning Portuguese was a necessity. Sure, I’m curious what my boyfriend is gabbing about with his parents, but, more importantly, this language shapes his world. “Language barriers can be hilarious or horrendous,” says Julie, a 29-year-old French-Canadian, whose Irish husband got coaching from her brother to ask her parents’ permission to marry their daughter in French. Because of an embarrassing practical joke her brother decided to play, her man ended up complimenting her mother’s breasts.

Don’t Be Jealous.
Jaycee and her Venezuelan boyfriend broke up temporarily when she got tired of playing second fiddle to his friends and family. This is not an uncommon feeling in relationships where one part comes from an individualistic culture and the other from a collectivistic one. According to Dr. Rosita Albert, currently a Visiting Scholar in Harvard’s Psychology Department, “If you are from an individualistic culture and your partner is from a collectivistic culture, you may seem selfish to him, and he may look overly involved with his family or friends to you. Realizing that cultural, and not only individual, differences are often at the root of conflicts can help intercultural relationships and prevent blaming the other person for the difficulties.” After communicating more, Jaycee understood that her boyfriend wasn’t trying to ignore her. Now his family, friends and his girlfriend all go out together.