And Bernstein says a little jealously is normal: “Even in true, healthy love, there can be some feelings of envy—but the key is working them through.”

But if the jealousy continues or is intolerable, he says that “this could be a red flag suggesting other relationship issues.”

So what could these red flags indicate? Bernstein explains: “The supporting spouse may fear that the dreaming spouse (if the dreams seem like they can be realized) could outgrow the other and be exposed to opportunities that could jeopardize the relationship.”

Yes, a compromise like this one might test the strength of your marriage. And just like when you were planning your wedding, you may have a few moments of “How am I in love with this idiot?” But with a little planning, some trust and a lot of patience, you should both be able to realize your dreams. Or at least give ‘em a shot.

Photo © Vanda