The Moment
Besides the need to make it special for you and the rest of the world that will hear about it, another thing that makes proposing stressful is the thought that the woman might say no. Sure, it’s 99 percent certain she’ll give the right answer, but a man never knows if she’ll change her mind in the moment when the reality of actually marrying his sorry ass hits her. “That one percent chance counts,” says Steve, 31, who planned an elaborate proposal evening including a limo, dinner and special stop at a romantic spot to help make it an offer his now-wife couldn’t refuse.

The Question
One other teeny tiny thing that weighs heavily on a guy’s mind is a little question: Am I ready to get married? It’s a question that every man has to ask himself, and one that only he can answer.

Bottom line, for a man, being engaged and then married means saying goodbye to adolescence. It means saying goodbye to bachelor pads, dirty laundry on the floor and dishes piled high in the sink.

I always felt I would meet someone, fall madly in love and ask her to marry me. But it was just this vague idea—something that would happen one day in the far off future.

That far-off future is now. I get married this summer.

John Crawford is a freelance writer, and a friend to women, based in the Boston area.

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