The Relationship Middle Ground

There is a middle ground between casual dating and a full-blown relationship, when you’ve gone beyond simply going out to dinner but have not yet entered into discussions like, “Where do you think this relationship is going?” The Inner Bitch Way to Intimacy can help you maneuver your way through this no-woman’s land, allowing you to decide how best to proceed.

For example, you’ve been seeing this guy for a while now and there’s an event coming up: a party, a wedding, a family reunion, Mom and Dad are coming to town. Do you bring him along or do you not even mention it to any of the parties involved?

You know what to do: WAIT [ask: What Am I Thinking?]

There are some things to consider while you’re thinking: How long have you been dating? Would you rather go alone? Do you really want to subject this man to that kind of microscopic scrutiny?

Are you thinking it would be nice to finally show up with a real date?

Or are you thinking that, at this point in the relationship, it’s time for him to meet those people who are near and dear (or distant and dear, or distant and disapproving … whatever) because it’s only fair to let him experience you in this sort of setting?

How you think about this situation matters a great deal. The first option smacks of desperation and an overwhelming desire to prove, once and for all, that you are not a total loser who can’t catch a man. Which is not really a good reason to inflict a wedding band version of the Alley Cat or your aunt Lulu’s Jell-O mold salad on anyone, no matter how you try to justify it.

Whereas wanting to give this man a chance to know you better is, well, a little more reasonable, don’t you think? Because not only will bringing him along allow him to get a glimpse of your real life, it will allow you to see how he responds to that new information.