4. Decide what size and type of group would be best to serve your needs. A small workshop? A large play party? A medium-sized swingers’ evening? Would you prefer to go to a couples-only event or not?

5. Make mutually agreed-upon rules for yourselves. Which activities are you comfortable with and which are you not? For instance, you and your partner may decide that you’d love to have sex in a group setting, but only with each other. If you and your partner are comfortable being sexual with others, set limits. For example, perhaps it’s fine with you if your partner gives someone a hand job, but not a blow job. Your partner may be comfortable with you participating in a BDSM scene so long as there is no genital contact. Perhaps all lower chakra penetrative sex is off limits, but oral sex is not. Whatever your rules, follow them scrupulously! If you find them too restrictive, don’t break them and then tell your partner; follow them and then discuss modifying them with your partner later.

6. Set time limits. Agree on how long you are willing to be apart or engaged with someone else; tell your new partners at the beginning of your encounter and set the timer on your watch. If you and your partner attend separate events, or if one of you is attending an event without the other, agree on a time and place to meet after the event and be there on time.