In the Moment Don’t: Let Problems Go Unacknowledged
Let’s face it, no matter how much you want each other or how attractive your partner may be, sex isn’t always smooth, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be. Addressing problems immediately in a relaxed manner and mutually coming up with solutions that satisfy both partners not only makes sex more fun, it also strengthens the relationship and gives your partner a better understanding of how your erotic buttons work.

After-the-Do Do: Break It Down
The last thing most people want to hear after a heated night of passion is a play-by-play analysis of who did what, but Dr. Barratt says that having a State of the Sexual Union conversation periodically during a relationship can be helpful and hot. “We have the fantasy that in a good relationship, the honeymoon is going to continue forever but the fact of the matter is that people grow and change at different speeds,” says Barratt. “These things need to be reviewed periodically.”

After-the-Do Don’t: Judge
One thing Dr. Ladas says to remember during the post-sex wrap-up is to never make judgments about your partner or blame them for less-than-idyllic sex. Once couples start playing the blame game, sexual communication goes the way of the dinosaur and couples are left with frustration and resentment. “It’s very important how the communication is made.” Talk honestly, frequently and gently, and you’ll build a lasting connection that’s worth talking about.

 

 

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