I'm in a long distance relationship and my boyfriend really wants me to move out there with him. My problem--I'd be leaving my job, my friends and my family...plus I don't know if I could find a new job...and what about making new friends? I DON'T want to just hang out with his friends and be a tag-along, you know? I would love to live near him, but i want to live my own life too. I'm scared, but I just can't take being in the long distance relationship anymore...

My advice would be to check out where he lives before you make any decisions. You've probably visited before, but go there with fresh eyes and ask yourself if you could really live there. Look for jobs too, see if there are any opportunities there for you. Long-distance relationships are tough, but if you did move and resented him for it that would be even worse.

It sounds like you don't really want to move. It's hard to give a straight answer without knowing the situation better, i.e. how serious you two are about each other, how comfortable you feel with change, etc. I've been in a long-distance relationship w/my bf as well, but we're not at the point of moving to be together.

I think you should go for it! If you try then you can find a decent job and move your way up. What's the point of living if you won't carpe diem?

If it were me, I'd find out as much about the work situation as I could before making any decisions. The worst thing is for you to resent him after you make the move and find yourself among the unemployed. It also sounds like you're close to your friends and family--do you see a future with your boyfriend? If you're not positive, then I would wait awhile before going for it.

I'm personally very impulsive and it gets me into trouble. I want to say "go for it," but I'll preach something I don't practice: create a pros and cons list first and weigh out your possibilities.

Have you tried asking him to move to be with you instead?

I agree with ucsdgirl. Why is it that you have to move over there? I don't want to seem pessimistic, but one of my friends left everything behind to move closer to her fiance. He ended up cheating and leaving her. I think it's best to stick with the life you've already made for yourself. If you guys are really meant to be, it'll work out no matter what.

Snowblue-- I am totally with you. My philosophy in life has always been--never move for a guy (I think my years of watching Felicity taught me that). But he's is in a program where he has to be there for five years...that's the problem. I see us working out...you know in the end. But I just don't know how I can wait five years living on opposite ends of the country.